Things you don't hear every day

So, I've had an eye opening experience - the alarm clock went off. Gawd, that was SOOO bad...

Last night was a bad night with the boy. He wouldn't let me brush his teeth. I told him that if he didn't take care of them, they would all fall out before he turned 3. Have you ever tried to brush the teeth of an almost 3-year old kid who didn't want them brushed? It might be easier to put pants on an octopus who is being crushed by a steamroller! . But, my little hellion child woke up this morning, sweet as can be with a smile and a kiss for mommy. From bad to good in just a few hours.

So anyhow, I have been collecting statements made by various people I work with all week. I collected them because they're things that you just don't hear people say very often. And they're kind of funny... Here for your reading pleasure, THINGS YOU DON'T HEAR EVERY DAY

"I'll be happier when my brother goes back to jail."

"You won't be invited to my funeral. I don't want you there."

"That's like comparing apples and pineapple juice, you just can't do that."

"I was sitting in my office, getting my freak on..."

"Just understand that I'm coming from the point of view that I'm the eagle"

"I don't want a raise."

"I need a roll of masking tape and a plastic ruler - it has to be plastic so I can use it the way I want to."

Do these people have any clue what they're saying? Do they know they sound mentally challenged? Do they care? Or are they afflicted with the stupid saying disease? I dunno, nor do I care. I say my share of stupid crap , but I realize it's stupid the moment it comes out of my mouth. These people never missed a beat and continued right along with their conversations. I dunno, perhaps I'm just a bit too easily amused!

On a happier note, I got to have coffee with my humming bird couple that feeds on my deck. They're getting bolder and bolder and coming closer and closer to me. I wish I knew which was the boy and which was the girl. They did have a mid-air collision the other day, and I was worried about the smaller one. But I saw them both back this morning. I'd like to give them names, but if I name them something trite like "Fred & Ethel" it'll just be giving in to commercialism. SO, I'm taking votes on what to name the humming birds, send me your suggestions! And will someone please tell me how to tell the sex of a hummingbird? I would't want to give the boy a complex by assigning the chick name to him. Then again, maybe they're both the same sex, in which case call George Bush and get him over to my house RIGHT AWAY so he can let them know why they can't get married and have benefits.

PP Out!