Super Snatch Saturday

At the request of Gary, seconded by Chrissy, today is Super Snatch Saturday! A celebration of my twat (and yours, if you have one!)

Somewhere in this story, I need to weave in a story of Jack in the bush.
And now, here it is, A Vaginal Celebration!

No one said it better than Phil Hartman on SNL, doing a skit about someone (I can't remember who) doing a book on tape voiceover for the Madonna book. "I like my vagina!" Perhaps that was an actual quote from the book, but I'm giving credit to Phil because he was a genius.

I was talking with Big Daddy last night and commented that I think that after having a baby, I could really care less who sees my snatch - meaning a nude beach doesn't frighten me any more. He didn't understand. And I explained it like this:

When a woman has a baby, a great number of people not only see her holiest of holies, but they put their hands and fingers in it. Any sense of modesty quickly disappears after the third or fourth person gets between your legs, inserts what feels like their entire arm and announces "4 cm!" I remember thinking "I know my vagina is small, but DAMN!"
And yes, I know they aren't talking about the size of the vaginal opening, but it sure does wonders for your ego!

Having said that, besides being a water slide for a baby coming into this world, my cooch (and yours) can be used for fun! All kinds of things can happen there. Your traditional sex with a penis, oral sex, sex with toys, vegetables, and kitchen utensils. Not to mention the wonders of detachable shower heads - but that's more for clitoral stimulation, now isn't it?

I personally prefer the Jack Rabbit. I've blogged about it many times and always try to throw in a not-so-veiled reference to it whenever I get the chance. I just believe that every woman should have one! AND if Gary ever runs for president, perhaps we'll get them free instead of campaign buttons. They could have some logo on it for the Party Party (if you've read Gary's blog, you understand this. If not, sucks to be you now, doesn't it?) ANYHOW, they could redesign the head of the unit to look like Gary. And his campaign speech can include something snappy like "A beer in every hand and my 'face' in every woman's crotch!"

Now here's where Chrissie's request comes in! Jack does not belong tucked in a drawer somewhere. He belongs in me. Setting 5 on the bottom rotating part and setting 4 or 5 on the rabbit ear piece (3rd setting if I want to achieve the big O in 4 or 5 seconds tops. ) To refresh your memory from my Toys 4 Us blog...

"With 7 speeds of shaft rotation (and beads at the base of the shaft for that extra special touch) its a great start. But it..s just that - just the start! Because the bunny ears also have 7 speeds. There..s the slow and steady (indicated by the green light), then a medium steady (yellow-orange light), and a high power steady (RED LIGHT! RED LIGHT!!! OH GAWD THE RED LIGHT!!!). None of those doing it for you? The next setting alternates from slow to high in short rapid bursts. Or the next, slow-med-high-med-slow-med-high over and over and over again! Or perhaps you..d like what I dub the "Morse Code" setting: Dot-dot-dot-DAAAAAAAAASSSSSHHHHOHGOD!!!! And then there's the completely random one, where you don't know what's coming next! (But I'd be willing to bet its you!)"

You know what they say - a jack in the bush is worth 2 in your hand. No, that's not right either. A jack a day keeps the doctor away? Possible. All work and no play - THAT NEVER HAPPENS WITH JACK!!

In closing, I present you with my list of other things to call your vagina besides "vagina". Feel free to add to this list - I like expanding my vocabulary!

Snatch - My all time favorite
Cooch
Cooter
Twat
Holiest of holies
Love tunnel
Crotch

What do you want to call your snatch today?